No, we don’t have those virtues here in Ghana!

Ever heard the saying, “Patience is a virtue”? Well, guess Ghana overslept on the day that Mother Universe was teaching that class! What in the world is everyone hurrying around for? Where are they going so fast, and if they are in such a hurry all the time, why are a lot of people always late?!

I mean, there is a constant rush – cars are always honking, even in back-to-back traffic where no-one can move more than one centimeter a second anyway!
You’d better be ready as soon as the few traffic lights we have turn green, otherwise, you’re liable to have insults hurled your way, and a long chorus of horns telling you what a moron you are! If you successfully prevent some jerk who is driving tragically from cutting in front of you where he (its usually a he, in fact, its always a he) should not be cutting in front of you, it is a given that he will hurl some insults your way, especially if you’re unfortunate enough to be a woman.

It is after a number of these experiences that I realized that Ghanaians in general are missing some basic characteristics that grease the ballpoints of a good human being. Its important to make the point, that I’m not saying Ghanaians are not good people, but they are missing the essential oils that help smooth the edges for a peaceful society. I’ll start with these 2 to begin with:
• Patience
• Respect

Before I get heckled, let me give the disclaimer that I’m also Ghanaian, although my family left when I was very young – 8 years old. They made sure we stayed connected to our homeland Ghana, however, with many trips back and forth, making sure we spent time with our many Aunts, Uncles, Grandmother, and Cousins. I’m also living in the U.S. at the moment, so I do have less exposure to the Ghanaian way of living, but let me give a few examples of what I’m describing:

1. No patience – So my 74-year-old mother and I went to the tax office for her to pay some taxes. We didn’t know which office to go to, so we went to one of the offices to ask for information. Once we got the info we wanted, we were leaving the office, so I walked ahead and opened the door for my Mum to exit first, what did you know, there was an early 40-s man who decided to enter through the door I’d opened, even though my mother was already partly through it. I couldn’t believe my eyes – we have one, an older person, two, a woman, and three, someone else had opened the door to leave – this guy didn’t open the door! I stopped him and told him that he should have stopped to allow my mother to go through, and why did he do such a rude thing! (I know, I’m too know for a woman in Ghana) He apologized, and we went on our way. (My grandmother has since told me that I was lucky in that instance that he didn’t turn around and insult me for being a “small girl” who dared to talk to him that way! )

2. I was at the bank once, withdrawing some money. I went to the teller window when it was my turn, and said “Good Afternoon” to the lady across the glass. She nodded her head and held out her hand. I handed her the cheque and then told her what denominations I wanted the money. Her next questions/responses to me, she never bothered to look at me once, and actually rudely threw the money across the counter to me when she was done. I again, told her what she did was very impolite, and that she needs to remember that I’m a customer of the bank, so she needs to treat me with respect, and then left in a huff!


3. Forget about a logical line forming for anything (from traffic, to lines at the bank, to paying for something at a store) – some people just seem to think chaos is the better solution – the more lines you have, the faster they will move through it! Of course, those of us with a working brain usually know that chaos is not the way to go, but end up stuck in the line for much longer, thanks to those asinine members of the Ghanaian society who have such a severe case of Impatientis that it has numbed their grey matter

4. At church, as we were leaving a funeral service, after the mourning party had exited the church, as we all know, usually, in an orderly situation, each pew leaves in an orderly manner, from back to front, or vice versa. Well in this particular case, I was fortunate enough to be sitting next to a man who was not satisfied with waiting his turn and kept pushing me to go into the aisle (I mean pushing – at a church, a funeral service!!!) I couldn’t believe my mind! I mean, did he want me to push the older women and men out my way and just barge out into their paths?!? After I stepped out, trying not to get trampled over, some other lady behind me kept pushing into me, as she was carrying her loud conversation with someone about 4 pews forward!

Now I could go on and on, because I have many many examples of this type of behaviour, but the bottom line – Ghanaians need help! Seriously! It might be too late to catch the older generation (those above the age of 25!), but we might still be able to catch the little ones – while they are in school.

The funny thing is that I don’t know when we lose the respect, because as children, I remember that the need to respect others was drummed into our heads, by hook or crook – so how is it that as adults, there is no trace of this respect left – IN GENERAL. Not saying everyone is like this, and women are better at showing respect than patience, but across the board, in general, the lack of the virtue of patience is shared across both genders! What happened to all that laid-back attitude that Ghanaians are supposed to have? Did we lose it somewhere between the hiked up food prices, and petrol prices? Did the heat melt it away? Or the rain wash it away? And with all the religiousity that is exhibited, its even more surprising that the situation is as it is!

So I’m thinking that its time to setup a notforprofit organization to inject some relaxedness, respect, patience learnings into our up-and-coming future society runners! I can’t add to the problem by simply leaving as quickly as I can – Ghana has way too much to offer, and I need to step to the program and start helping us be our best!